Worthy Brewing

Blogtopia

Enter or Die

Thu, 30 Jun 2016 18:55:00

 

Masters Bike Racers:

The Cascade Cycling Classic is the best and oldest stage race in the U.S.  We’ve created a separate 50+ category for Masters. But to date only 7 have registered.

To these blessed 7, we say: Bravo!  To the rest, we say: Huh?

Yes, yes, most of us wait until the last second. We could crash. We could go broke. We could get fat, slow and stupid. And some of us think it’s stealth to intend to race but not register early, as said disclosure would be sure to amp up the competition to train harder.

Balderdash! Here’s the deal: we need to get at least 50 racers registered by July 15th. Otherwise, we will combine all the masters fields in one giant cluster.

Let me refresh:

  • The fastest time trial course in the world. Just under 9 miles. Freshly resurfaced asphalt. The smooth surface practically catapults you forward. It defies all the usual gravity and thermo laws, but yet I swear when you go up it feels like going down.  Click here for the course map.
  • The most fan friendly criterium course in the Northwest.  Downtown 4 corner crit. Flat, safe and freaking fast.  Craft beer. Craft donuts. Crafty cheering adoring fans filling their faces with steelhead tacos. And artisanal pizza and ocean rolls.  Click here.
  • Road Races designed for closers. Not too steep. Not too far.  Just right. And conveniently located near a glacier, mountain lake and roaring white water river.
  • Captain Nimrod’s Pound-Flail Ale.  A tribute to legendary speed merchant, Chris “Hipp Star” Hipp, the original hipster who gave us the fanny pack-on-skin suit fashion Faux Pas.  Worthy brewed this golden ale today. Racers get a free pint.
  • Tons of cash ($9,000 for the 3 masters categories), merchandise and jerseys. Remember, we front loaded the time bonuses to the podium finishers to level out the skinny mutant to bar banger spectrum. The cool thing is that being on a bike in Bend this summer makes everyone an automatic winner!

And housing. Get this. The local Central Oregon Community College is opening up its spanking new student dormitory to bike racers. There are 30 rooms available. Another strong reason to register today!  Farrah Fawcett pinups for $3 if you order now.

Register here.

This is going to be great! Thank you Masters Bike Racers.

Bull Goose Looney

PS:  Attention 40+ Racers: All world Dan Bryant’s lovely sister is getting married. He regrets having to attend, which means he will miss the CCC, which means the top spot on the podie is wide open. Register now.

PSS: Note to our friends from Socal. Don’t be alarmed by our litter free roadsides, drinkable water from the tap, bike friendly culture, cool mountain mornings, happy river floaters and sales tax free commerce. This is not likely to spread to your neighborhood.

 

I don’t need no stinking skin suit!
 

Speaking of Legends Departed, iconic hard man Steve Larsen is a former winner of the CCC in the masters division.
 

Here’s Steve punishing the field solo. Labor!
 

Ride aggressively, not not too agro, or this could be you.

Post navigation

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *